Human Preserves: Recalling the definition of human preserves in Chapter 5, “Company Time Components,” they include the gyms, spas and resorts across the world catering to keeping humans perverted—oops, preserved—and providing happy endings, no way, I meant providing happiness. Gyms and smaller-scale studios can be risky at times, especially when they offer cardio strip tease, not to mention those group OMing classes, which encourage students to wear little or no clothing to feel sexier. At this point you probably know full well the risk prevention move when no longer sexually available.
Not as challenging, but still potentially troublesome, is the co-ed gym’s workout floor. While most are respectful of others’ workout time, some feel it acceptable to initiate a conversation while sharing equipment or on a nearby cardio machine. The use of an iPod and earplugs can go a long way in fending off any random focused approaches.
Signing up with an opposite-sex personal trainer can become risky, especially when the training calls for the trainer to touch and support the trainee’s body. I never quite understood why any significant touching was necessary here at all. Assistance in stretching out is nice, but certainly many athletes have managed to stretch without any help. Maybe gyms in this instance can borrow from the rules at airport and nightclub security checkpoints that allow for same-gender pat-downs only—especially since the trainer can handpick the hottest members for a free training session or two. The best prevention in this situation when sexually unavailable is to pay the customary price for a same-sex trainer.
As for spas, getting a massage from an opposite-sex person with one’s partner present is not a problem. But when not together, does one really need to have an opposite-sex person give one a massage while one has no clothes on? If there are no sexual intentions, why not wear a bathing suit or at least full underwear during the process, especially when using the in-room spa services that are now offered at many resorts around the world. To my knowledge, there are no true international standards on what is touched and not touched or what is covered and not covered. That’s before any massage creep.
Opposite-sex massages can be especially risky in places where prostitution is legal or overlooked. Should an honestly monogamous partner have a third-party opposite-sex person massaging them, and in many ways pleasuring their body sexually? One might realize how there can easily be genitalia arousal at some point if any sexual attraction exists between the two involved in the massage. Outside the spa scenario—say at a house party—no doubt an innocent massage over one’s clothing in a semi-private area has led many to losing those clothes—if not becoming hard or wet.
To be honest, one of my biggest dating pet peeves is when a partner is completely naked in a room alone with a strong masculine male pampering almost every inch of her body. Why should any gender take the risk of getting massaged naked by an opposite-sex person they might find sexually interesting or who might find them sexually interesting, or both?
Now for a personal request or rather, some preventative advice. Each gender should wear a full coverage swimsuit to keep private parts private in any “opposite-sex non-partner present” masseuse scenario, no matter how professional the masseuse appears to be. Sticking with a same-sex masseuse is the ultimate safeguard, especially when on property at one’s resort.
Speaking of which, sometimes just as risky are the standard resort personnel, ranging from the concierge to the all-too-prevalent entertainment staff, whose sole purpose is to cater to each guest’s every need, while coordinating all of the fun activities, almost all of which are co-ed. If one is not sexually available and “flying solo,” the majority of the activities are questionable and ultimately sexual in nature, especially those that encourage booty shaking in a dance-off competition. Resort personnel and guests both might get the wrong idea.
In a stealthy kind of way, the “water crews” that oversee the ocean and lake-related activities such as jet skis, scuba diving, snorkeling and parasailing can be the most risky. Almost always fit and youthful, all it takes is one offer for a free try or ride for trouble to brew. And do not forget those tennis instructors and personal tour guides.
Finally, avoiding opposite-sex third parties in one’s resort room while alone and even with other same-sex people around is the safest bet for protecting against temptation, especially when some of the “others” are having sex. Allowing opposite-sex people to hang out in the confined space of a hotel room when one is still sleeping, showering or changing rarely makes sense.
Even without anyone physically in the room, unblocked windows should be blocked before changing, no matter how nice it is outside at the moment. Balconies pretty much guarantee someone of the opposite sex will have a view, thus being on a balcony while in underwear, just a towel, or even less is strongly discouraged unless one really wants someone “knocking at the door.”